Conflict – Solving Problems Without Mediation

It would be wrong for adults to try and solve every problem their children encounter. Problem solving skills need to be learned. One technique to get children used to solving their own problems is for the authority person to set a timed resolution period after which the mediator will settle the dispute. Be willing to accept any reasonable resolution that meets with the approval of the battling individuals. Here's an example.

Parent: "So, you both want to play with this particular toy at the same time. I'm going to let you talk about the problem for two minutes and see if you can work out a solution. If you haven't agreed on something after two minutes then you will have to live with my decision on the subject."

Arguers: "We better decide to share or this toy is going to be taken away from us."

"I think you are right. We can time each other. I want the first turn since you just had it."

"Well, I guess that would be fair."

"We are going to share."

Parent: "Good! I'm glad you came up with your own solution!"

Discuss some situations where timed resolution would work well.

Finding Joy – Pass It On

"There are souls in this world which have the gift of finding joy everywhere and of leaving it behind them when they go."
                           --Frederick William Faber

Take turns giving examples of how a person can find joy and then pass it on to another person.